What we perceive is not always what is. Messages in the form of pictures, words, sounds, and vibrations are targeted at us each day via people, television, radio, newspapers, and magazines. Some of the information is impressive enough to compel and evoke us to make assumptions, pass judgments, and draw conclusions. Other sensational messages even provoke weak and wicked souls to violence, racial division, and hatred.

The media coverage of news, world events, and issues does affect public and private opinions. As I reminisce about my study of “cameras in the courtrooms” as a journalism student years ago before TV cameras were allowed into hearings and trials, I can see now why I was suspect of it. Now there are channels dedicated covering trials. TV coverage of the O.J. Simpson murder trial was extreme to say the least. Hurting people in this real-life crisis were treated like actors in a continuous saga. Innocent or guilty, can defendants get a fair trial with so too media coverage?

Finally, the reading of the not guilty verdict caused all kinds of reactions. The media said a majority of Blacks were happy about the verdict, while a majority of Whites were unhappy. Well, what did they expect? America has a shameful history of legal slavery, Jim Crow laws, discrimination, and racism that has perpetuated ongoing divisions and distractions to deceive people from completing their higher missions.

The race of a person should not matter when it comes to justice or any other factor in life. In fact, race diversity is one of God’s gifts to humanity, offering variety and beauty. Each race has special gifts to help all humanity. We all should feel good about who we are and the race we were born into. However, if we listen to popular rhetoric, inferiority and superiority complexes will invade us.
To cleanse ourselves from deception on all levels, we must erase all of our perceptions and preconceived ideas, then prayerfully begin our ingestion of information (scriptures first) with a clear and open mind and a willing spirit.

Optical illusions look so real. Yet, when the viewing angle on an object is altered or the object is moved, a whole new picture is seen. But why didn’t we see it in the first place? Human beings will one day see the real picture of their lives, purposes, and destinies, asking this same baffling question – “why didn’t we see it in the first place? However, we have the power to refuse a destiny of regret.

To live life effectively and purposefully, fulfilling our higher mission — to glorify our Maker and return to Him — we must have a clean heart created and a right spirit renewed within us. This can only be done through our Creator with our cooperation.

“Judge not that ye be not judged.”- Matthew 7:1

Ella Coleman

The balance of work and play paves the road to quality living. The symmetry of these two are absolutely necessary.  All work and no play or all play and no work can be self-defeating. However, blending labor with fun and leisure is a target worth the aim and the shooting. And there’s no sweeter place than the bull’s-eye of a balanced life. Yet today, few people come close to the center.  Some work too much and have little or no fun while others become engrossed in entertainment, recreation and over indulgence.

Oh, go ahead and have fun, only don’t let fun have the best of you.  Some folks try so hard to enjoy themselves until they defeat the reason for it in the first place–to refresh, rest and replenish from work and routine.  Having fun with focus should be the goal. Vacations, family reunions, hiking, biking, and trips to amusement parks and beaches are fun activities but should be balanced with allotted times for quietness and stillness. So much is going on until it’s go, go, go.  The “merry-go-round” of life is exciting for a while but eventually all riders want to stop and get off. Twenty-four hours in circles is not going to get it when it comes to enjoying a fulfilling life.

To get a new lease on life for returning to work more rejuvenated than ever, be wise in how you have fun. If fun is finished with a hangover, tired baggy eyes, more stress or a feeling of guilt for some ungodly thing that was done, what’s the purpose? Well, there is no purpose in wasted time and energy, even in the name of fun.

On the other end of the spectrum, being a workaholic can be unhealthy as well.  Is it really worth it to work one’s life away and miss out on all other important aspects of living, like enjoying a mate, children, family, friends, church and community? Obsessed with the next task, a labor extremist can get so caught up in their work, career or ministry that it’s too late when they realize they are out of touch with their loved ones.  It’s a rude awakening to wake up one day and realize they don’t know their wife, husband, children, family or friends anymore.  So, all work and no
play or recess can be just as damaging as unbalanced fun.

Many people have been caught up in a loop between work and play only to find themselves burnt out, empty and unfulfilled. For instance, rest, exercise, and healthy eating and thinking contribute to one’s health and wellness. Without such basic discipline, eventually an individual will be too unhealthy to carry out his or her mission in life.

Understandably, preparation and process for a success requires sacrifice. Sometimes family members must give up some of their time with loved ones who are completing a degree or special training for a specific occupation, profession, or ministry. Yet, in all the prerequisites of achievement, one should strive for balance by scheduling in family and recreational activities. Although such priorities should be automatic or “a given” and seem elementary, they are the cause of many divorces and broken relationships.

So, when is work and play balanced and effective? When they both enhance one’s own life and the lives of others in some small or great way. Work and recreation should create a healthy equilibrium that enhance the quality of life. Remember, success without good relationships and work without play can leave one empty and unfulfilling. There is no need to live under par when balance and prosperity is available to us.

“There is nothing better for a man, than that he should eat and drink, and that he should enjoy good in his labour. This also I saw, that it was from the hand of God.”    – Ecclesiastes 2:24 KJV

    The treasures of purpose are found in the chest of originality. It is  the uniqueness in each of us that is most needed by others. Finding or creating a means through which that difference can be lovingly expressed is a critical pursuit. We should let no one or nothing deter us from the path to actualization.

Divinely structured within the core of each person is a unique composition. Biologically, this substance causes a distinction in every human fingerprint. Spiritually, it stamps a purpose in the heart of each individual to be discovered and lived. When purpose has not been realized, frustration, confusion and a host of other negatives harbor in the soul. As best-selling author Dr. Myles Munroe writes in his book, In Pursuit of Purpose, “When purpose is not known, abuse is inevitable.” So, when we look around and see unhappiness and emptiness in talented and gifted people, it is because they do not know their purpose or they know it but are not living it. Usually adversities and circumstances are a set-up and a part of the process to purpose and meaning.  Recently I watched an interview of the 1984 Olympic ski champion and paraplegic Bonnie St. John on “Life Today” hosted by James and Betty Robison.  Interestingly, St. John, who had her leg amputated at age five, was born into a poor family, and sexually abused from age two to seven.  Even with all of that weighing against her, her mother lovingly insisted on excellence and no excuses. She went on to become a ski champion, a wonderful mother, author and motivational speaker. Bonnie shared her story to help others overcome insurmountable odds. She talked about how many times she fell and suffered trying to learn how to ski with one leg but noted the advantage she had over other skiers. Bonnie said she didn’t have to worry about her skis crossing because she only had one. Stories like this assure us that we can prevail and be triumphant even when we have a disadvantage. “A setback is just a setup for a comeback,” says award-winning motivational speaker and author Willie Jolley. So many times what is considered a severely negative situation is really an opportunity waiting to be acted upon. But the outcome depends greatly on attitude and the decision of refusing to be defeated.  If handled wisely, the problems we face provide the best clues to finding purpose and fulfillment. “May He [God] grant you according to your heart’s desire and fulfill all your purpose.” – Psalm 20:4

Valuing Relationships

Learning the art of good relations can be a lifetime quest. It requires a willingness to give and to forgive continually, and this can cause many to lose heart and give up on people who do not have the wisdom or strength to reciprocate such love. This type of discouragement and disappointment causes divorces, family breakups, and terminated friendships. Yet, when we watch the effective workings of good relationships, love, respect and trust for oneself and others from each person comprises the premise on which they are built. Therefore, each one is responsible for doing his/her part.

In this life, one has to pay a great price for evading and abusing relationships for which he/she has been entrusted. Fathers and mothers cannot abandon or abuse children and escape the penalty of their unwise choices. Nor can a husband or wife mistreat his/her mate and leap into another marriage peacefully blessed without settling all unfinished business of the prior relationship. If he/she does not deal honestly with personal faults and character flaws, that baggage is carried into the next relationship and can evolve into a depleting, viscous cycle.

Unhealthy cycles can be broken through honesty, prayer, and a commitment to change personally, for we cannot change others. Self-improvement means relationship enhancement. Since we have attracted people who have many of our own traits or the opposite but “packaged” differently, it is smart to look at them less critically and more inquisitively. One valid question to ask is, “Why did I attract this person into my life?” The answers discovered can be amazing. So, let’s keep an open mind and a positive attitude for learning all we can.

“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.” – Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 NKJV

Ella Coleman